An Angels Message

A poem I wrote for my baby cakes. An Angels Message One day an angel came to me and asked me why I was so sad. I said that you were taken fro me by another persons hands. I felt that my life has ended that day you were called back home And felt that life had no meaning ever since you've been gone. I never felt so broken in heart, mind and soul and why God would do this to leave me so broken and so cold. The Angel replied so nicely in words of compassionate and love. Don't think that God has abandoned you as he watches from above. He brought your son to glory and he suffers no more pain. He shines on brightly in all the stars above, his spirit lives on forever as gently as Aprils rain. He has never left you and watches when you cry, he holds your hand and wishes he could take away your pain. He sees you When you blow a kiss to him each and every single night. He doesn't want to see you sad and wants you to be alright. He asked me to tell you he is happy and content for he has seen the light. Please don't live in sorrow, please don't live in despair. Remember him as happy and know he is always there. He sends you so many signs just to let you know, she told me to remember all the dimes and how big the roses grow. They are little gifts from him because he knows you love him so. One thing the Angel also said and oh with such delight, he hears your message you send him each and every night. He truly wants you to know this and to make sure I won't forget, remember the words mom you say to me each night, that when it's time God calls you home I'll meet you at the crossroads and hold you oh so tight.

Been So Long

I haven't written here is so long! So much has happened these last few months. Life has been so unkind to us I wonder some days how I get up each day. My boys are suffering so and I just pray each night that they be ok. Matt broke his foot in 10 places and needed surgery. Joey is just so unhappy. Well we all are. People look at us thru differnt eyes, they don't realize that we still suffer each day in pain. Good friends and family do, but when something happens, the looks I see that I get makes me want to cry. Like we are good people, but sometimes the pain and the hardship of each day living just trying to be normal can be so hard on us. All of us includes my sons. They suffer too. Maybe it's been 5 years now but grief can strangle you at any time and take away all you worked for to get back to that "normal" place, just to bring you back down. We had a candle light vigil for Timmy his 5 year angel day July 13th 2012. It even fell on a Friday the 13th. I decided it would be my last one, only next time thur the years I want to just keep it a simple personal family thing, its just to hard on me anymore and so hard on my boys. Timmy will never be forgotten. I love him always and I love my boys. I pray each night they find some peace in their hearts and the understand in others. And wish that people would also know that this is a life time membership of pain, never would I wish on anyone, but just ask for understanding and pray for my family, especially my boys. They need that more now than ever!